Blex's Deodorant / Antiperspirant Tee Stain Resuscitation Experiment
We all wear a ton of tee-shirts
throughout our lives and some of us (like me) prefer to use a gel
deodorant. I've tried the using other types of deodorant but I'm picky
and OCD and don't feel the same without using right-guard deodorant and
antiperspirant gel. YET, what SUCKS is that antiperspirants all have
ALUMINUM as an ingredient, and after wearing teeshirts for a while, the armpits get all
white, stained, and crusty !!! I've amassed and discarded so many
teeshirts throughout the years and all get ruined after about a year of
wearing. I thought to myself a few years ago there has to be a way to
get the best of both worlds and wear gel deodorant and keep my shirts
from getting the white-death resulting in a slow death from
aluminum-armpit virus! BUT NOW in 2013, I've began to notice the
aluminum stains are occurring faster and faster and I can hear the
shirts in my closet crying over and over again "Help Me!! Help Me!!"
So, a few years ago I decided to look up how to get these type of
stains off of my shirt armpits. There a number of techniques people
have used and had success. But me, I've tried a ton of them and got no
results! My attempts at tee shirt resuscitation have all failed! People
claim to be able to remove the stains by using certain methods of
removal but I believe they are confusing sweat stains with deodorant
sweat stains because I've been shit out of luck in all my attempts.
I usually use a navy blue Brewers jersey shirt as a test shirt. For
example, I've used the below Ryan Braun jersey shirt several times while trying to win the war on the stubborn stains.
can't imagine how the shirt feels being subject to such crude
experiments. The wounded shirt has sat over and over in my closet and,
if it were alive, I probably would hear it screaming in the middle of
Here is a list of the methods I have tried using while attempting to resurrect my tee shirts back from the dead:
Vinegar: Some say soak in vinegar. Bullshit, I've soaked the armpits of the shirts
for hours and hours multiple times and the stains are always ... STILL
Aspirin: Some say rub aspirin. Again, NOPE! Tried that, nothing ... STILL THERE!
- Lava Soap: Some say use lava soap. WRONG AGAIN! Tried that and lo and behold ... STILL THERE!
- Mouthwash: I
thought maybe the alcohol might make the stains heat off. Rather than
pour and waste a bottle of fine Jack Daniels on the stains I tried
mouthwash. Bad idea ... STILL THERE !!!
Lemon Pledge: Some people claim that soaking shirts in lemon pledge
makes the the stains vanish into thin air. THAT'S A NEGATIVE ... STILL
Salt: Some say table salt does the job. No sir-e-bob it does not! I
grabbed a box of Motrin Salt, poured it on the armpits, scrubbed it in, and
NOPE ... STILL THERE!
- Toothpaste: Thought
that maybe some of those odd whitening chemicals and crap they put in
toothpaste might do the job. I was wrong ... STILL THERE!
- Resolve Pre-Treat Stain Remover Stick:
This product claims to remove every stain in the book. So I rubbed a
crap load on the stains .. Yeah Right! Plus, seeing I bought a product
that specifically claims to remove stains, I felt betrayed as the
outcome was (of course) ... STILL THERE!
- KaBoom! Soap Scum Remover: I figured that since it cleans nicely and changes colors when you spray
in the shower it may work. Wrong ... STILL THERE!
- Joy Dish Soap: It gets dishes clean so I figured maybe it would work some magic! A futile effort ... STILL THERE!
Pine Sol: It's a good "All Purpose Cleaner" so I figured might as well give
this a try and see if it does the job. Tossed the stuff on it and
scrubbed it in really good and NOPE ... STILL THERE!
OXY Clean: Some say this shit
works like magic and never fails so I tried this method and sprinkled the crap
power on both sides of the arm pit and scrubbed it in as hard as I could. NOTHING AGAIN ... STILL THERE!
Here are some other known attempts that I have yet to try:
- Lemon Juice
- Baking Soda
- Meat Tenderizer
- Piss (alright, I made this one up)
The DEO-GO Experiment: 5/29/2013:
I decided I couldn't keep punishing the shirts so I bought After receiving my bottle of DEO-GO, it was EXPERIMENT TIME! The
instructions said turn the shirts inside out, spray on the stains, then
rub with a "short-bristle brush," let sit for 30 minutes, and then wash
and dry like normal. So, after grabbing about 8-10 shirts with a bunch
of stains I did exactly what the directions said. But, I was confused
as to what a "short-bristle brush" actually was. I even googled the
words and looked at the pictures like a lamer to learn what it looked
like! I had this tiny brush that looks like a mini paint brush and
figured that should suffice.
FIRST RESULT: STILL THERE ... BUT ... I saw IMPROVEMENT! The stains on the
inside of the armpits looked about half-removed but I worry that maybe
I'm just seeing what I want to see and maybe nothing had changed.
The directions also say to repeat if treating doesn't work the first
time. I figured that while treating the inside maybe not enough of the
goo-spray got on the outside. So I flipped the shirts non-inside-out
and did it again!
SECOND RESULT: IT ACTUALLY WORKED !!! DEO-GO has proved to me that is
the defibrillator of deodorant / antiperspirant armpit stains !!! In
hindsight, I think it probably would work better to START by NOT
turning the shirts inside out. After all, that is what people see and
what you are looking to remove. Furthermore, USE PRESSURE when using
the brush to scrub the goo into the stains.
Here is the Yovani Gallardo shirt that I thought was ready for burial (aka, donating to goodwill):
!!!!!!!! WINNER !!!!!!!!!
What else can I say, apparently I just made a web page that advertises
for DEO-GO! If the company visits this page and wishes to thank me by
sending me tons of money or a lifetime supply of the product feel free
to CONTACT ME !! For the rest of
you, I hope I can save you all from trying the methods listed above
that DON'T WORK. Just buy this and WA-LA .. Resuscitated SHIRTS !!!